Conversation with Nat's coworker

The following conversation took place today at 11:01 am. I was particularly proud of it and wanted to share. Note. Some parts of the conversation have been edited for style and content. The names are as they appeared on the chat window. NOTE: After everything she says, I reserve the right to say "That's what she said," because that's what she actually said!

Nat: good plan! well im off to the tire store

(6 minutes)

me: enjoy yourself
have fun buying tires
and replacing them
and rotating them
and inflating them
and deflating them
and reinflating them
and then kicking them
and then driving on the rims
and then walking around
and then looking around

Nat: hahaha this is actually krista now
nat accidentally left his thing up

me: Nat, you are not a girl
we've been over this

Nat: no he's not

me: you are Nat
you are a man

Nat: but he definitely works with one

me: don't speak in 3rd person either, Nat
remember to take your medication

Nat: i'll try to remind him tomorrow

me: and don't forget your accordion lessons
no, you do it
you take your medication
this is your problem

Nat: if i take the medication i dont think its gonna have the same affect
call me crazy

me: not his or hers or the government's problem

Nat: hahaha

me: Crazy, don't forget your medication
and call you Nat, Crazy

Nat: ok i'm getting off now i officially feel weird talking as nat

Def Leppard schedule

What up, jiggas!

Here is our schedule for basketball. I was fixin' to put us in the highest division so we could really upset the serious players. But they said that we would be moved down if we were really bad. So in order to avoid changes in schedules, I had us placed in the lowest division humanly possible. Any lower and we would be playing against the Teletubbies JV team.

Jan 24. - Thur. - 8:00 p.m. - 144 Richards
Feb 5. - Tues. - 9:00 p.m. - 144 Richards
Feb 16. - Sat. - 9:00 a.m. - 156 Richards
Feb 29. - Fri. - 8:00 p.m. - 144 Richards
Mar. 14 - Fri. - 6:00 p.m. - 144 Richards

Derek thinks that we are going to dominate. Personally I think "spank me sideways" is a good team motto. I expect Nat will have this all on google calendar and will send us all some invites for good measure.

The Def Leppard embryo is about to be birthed. Prepare to eat amniotic sac vestiges opposition!

Whoopsie Oatesy

Hey y'all. I just have to make amends to our dear friend Zack. Shortly after my early morning victory of Settlers of Catan over Derek and a stranger named Matt who shall go unnamed, I was sitting with Zack at the Intramural Sports office. The female clerk who was taking our money gave Zack a warm hug and then went to the back room. Zack then remarked to me, "We used to date." I then yelled out, "That's your ex-girlfriend!?!?!" The woman was astonished, embarrased, then upset, then wouldn't make eye contact with either of us. Zack blushed, as did she. She was real mad. I tried to smooth things over by saying, "I'm not even sorry." But to no avail....again. I tried to give her an apologetic hug, but she spurned my advances. Zack tried to apologize on my behalf, but she was not having it. She later texted Zack a response. He refused to show it to me.

So this is my public apology to Oatesy Foatesy. In my defense, I reserved you a spot to get an intramural schedule. So call it even?

And I make an appeal to all Elitists to harass Zack to show us what the woman texted to him.

BOO YAH!!!

Spank me sideways!

Bryant the Loser

Bryant you were engaged. Almost engaged. Then proposed to thrice. She left you at the altar on your wedding day.

I met you. Derek saw me. You just walked away. I'm blogging your story.

You came to BYU to avoid the friends of your ex-fiance who broke up with you on your wedding day. In her town of 60,000 people, 300 go to our school. You have met 7 of them. And they laugh at you.

You are a crap-magnet.

Thanks for sharing.

Yeah, no shhhh.

I posted nothing.

Guys Night Out Uber Alles

Listen, I don't know who crowned Josh the official Elite 8 planner, but I've got a good one to book for us: Cougarettes in Concert, Feb 27-Mar1. Ohhhhhhhhh baby. You should have all received an email with the details

Maybe this year one of us will be the man to walk on stage at the end with a long stemmed rose and a small black box...

Trip to the Cabin

As official planner of the Elite 8, I thought I bring to everyone's attention that we have a break on the 21st from school. So, for whom (is that right Zack?) ever needs to make arrangements with work and school, make sure you have that weekend free. Right now the plan is to go to the cabin, but its still in the planning. Let me know if there are any other ideas.