1 year ago
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Foxwood Cleaning Check Policy - get ready!
If you were annoyed by King Henry's cleaning checks policy, check out this mutha from Foxwood:
"•Cleaning checks: A monthly cleaning check will be performed. The inspection will be conducted sometime between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. on that scheduled day. Each roommate will be required to complete cleaning as divided on the form. It will be up to the roommates to decide who has which cleaning assignment. Each roommate is expected to do his/her share of the cleaning or charges will be assessed accordingly. All re-checks will be charged a $10 fee for the area that fails, the roommate responsible will be assessed the fine. If at any time you fail a re-check, you consent to LREM having the area cleaned and charging you $30.00 an hour per person for the cleaning (2 hour minimum)."
KH is $5 for re-checks, and $20 an hour limited to only the minutes that it takes to clean where you failed.
Two hour minimum? That's $60! Perhaps they will be more lenient...
"•Cleaning checks: A monthly cleaning check will be performed. The inspection will be conducted sometime between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. on that scheduled day. Each roommate will be required to complete cleaning as divided on the form. It will be up to the roommates to decide who has which cleaning assignment. Each roommate is expected to do his/her share of the cleaning or charges will be assessed accordingly. All re-checks will be charged a $10 fee for the area that fails, the roommate responsible will be assessed the fine. If at any time you fail a re-check, you consent to LREM having the area cleaned and charging you $30.00 an hour per person for the cleaning (2 hour minimum)."
KH is $5 for re-checks, and $20 an hour limited to only the minutes that it takes to clean where you failed.
Two hour minimum? That's $60! Perhaps they will be more lenient...
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
BYUSA Candidates
I just went to the Q&A for BYUSA Presidency candidates.
The experience cemented my satisfaction in having chosen to work for the Green Team.
Voting is next week fellas. Do it.
1st Round: Mon - Wed
Finals: Thu - Fri
The experience cemented my satisfaction in having chosen to work for the Green Team.
Voting is next week fellas. Do it.
1st Round: Mon - Wed
Finals: Thu - Fri
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
APARTMENT
Here I take my stand, brethren.
I just won't pay more than I paid for King Henry. I normally wouldn't even have paid as much as we do pay for King Henry right now. But I didn't have much choice coming off of the mission.
This may be stretching the doctrine, but I think that to live in a place such as Alpine Village is going against our current Prophet's counsel to live within our means. I know that our parents in some cases are willing to pay as much, they have those means. But imagine us being cut off from our parents, we would not be able to live in Alpine Village and live within our means simultaneously. We should not want to try. It just is not realistic for us as college students. I think there are many lessons to be learned from living in humble lodgings that we have yet to learn. Those of us who plan on starting families in the near future have to get weaned away from such cushy amenities and get used to living like the poor college students we really are.
Personally, I like the idea of living in something of a dump like Campus Plaza and staying close to campus. Call it foolish masochism, I call it prudent minimalism. Many great men who have gone before have had to live in such conditions. On the other hand, do any of us know any great people who have had everything they wanted just given to them?
Also, this way we can keep members who want to follow the group, like Mike Rees, without lying to the Alpine Village owners by saying he is a BYU student when, in fact, he is not.
Of course the idea of settling for less when you can have more seems to go against modern popular wisdom, and I think that's partially why I like it. "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less travelled by. And that has made all the difference."
I am Josh. I am a bold Lamanite.
I just won't pay more than I paid for King Henry. I normally wouldn't even have paid as much as we do pay for King Henry right now. But I didn't have much choice coming off of the mission.
This may be stretching the doctrine, but I think that to live in a place such as Alpine Village is going against our current Prophet's counsel to live within our means. I know that our parents in some cases are willing to pay as much, they have those means. But imagine us being cut off from our parents, we would not be able to live in Alpine Village and live within our means simultaneously. We should not want to try. It just is not realistic for us as college students. I think there are many lessons to be learned from living in humble lodgings that we have yet to learn. Those of us who plan on starting families in the near future have to get weaned away from such cushy amenities and get used to living like the poor college students we really are.
Personally, I like the idea of living in something of a dump like Campus Plaza and staying close to campus. Call it foolish masochism, I call it prudent minimalism. Many great men who have gone before have had to live in such conditions. On the other hand, do any of us know any great people who have had everything they wanted just given to them?
Also, this way we can keep members who want to follow the group, like Mike Rees, without lying to the Alpine Village owners by saying he is a BYU student when, in fact, he is not.
Of course the idea of settling for less when you can have more seems to go against modern popular wisdom, and I think that's partially why I like it. "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less travelled by. And that has made all the difference."
I am Josh. I am a bold Lamanite.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Crossword
Hey guys, if any of you read the Tuesday, February 12, Daily Universe, you would see that I put a second copy of the crossword where the Sudoku should have been.
So yeah, chalk it up as my first major screwup at the Universe. Hopefully the last, but probably not.
If a friend asks, "What kind of idiots do they have working there?"
You may proudly answer, "My roommate is the kind of idiot they have working there."
Then they'll say, "Wait, Zack did that?"
To which you may say, "Yeah. Yeah he did. And he shamelessly walks around naked at his workplace too."
So yeah, chalk it up as my first major screwup at the Universe. Hopefully the last, but probably not.
If a friend asks, "What kind of idiots do they have working there?"
You may proudly answer, "My roommate is the kind of idiot they have working there."
Then they'll say, "Wait, Zack did that?"
To which you may say, "Yeah. Yeah he did. And he shamelessly walks around naked at his workplace too."
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Josh and Allie...almost siblings?
The latest development. After I was telling my parents about my date with Sister [Sandy1, F]. I told my mom about her dad's profession. Guess what... my mom and her dad used to date and were almost engaged!
My mom wrote to him during his mission, I guess he broke up with her. But all my life my parents have told me about how my mom could have married the president of NuSkin. And apparently, in her family, her mom has been known to say, "You should have married Sue."
We'll have pictures later of the two parents, Allie and I could have been brother and sister! but... yeah, what could this possibly mean? We'd like to hear your comments.
My mom wrote to him during his mission, I guess he broke up with her. But all my life my parents have told me about how my mom could have married the president of NuSkin. And apparently, in her family, her mom has been known to say, "You should have married Sue."
We'll have pictures later of the two parents, Allie and I could have been brother and sister! but... yeah, what could this possibly mean? We'd like to hear your comments.
Guest post from Def Leppard Veteran
This is George, John's older brother, given temporary access to post on this blog. I would like to spend the time I have here encouraging the authors of this blog to proudly and courageously bear the Def Leppard torch with a marked indifference towards the threats of low-level and petty employees of the BYU intramural athletics organization.
Some weeks ago, I gave you my blessing in resurrecting a noble institution, even going so far as to authorize the use of the Def Leppard name. I have recently learned that fear of intramural banishment has caused certain members of the group to fail in this sacred trust by not upholding the time-honored ideals of Def Leppard Basketball.
Here's a little refresher course:
1. Def Leppard is not, in fact, about the sport of basketball.
2. At no time should the team ever focus on winning the game.
3. Letter-of-the-law sportsmanship and rule-keeping is a must - in fact, this concept taken to its extreme can be an entertaining and rewarding part of the Def Leppard experience. The limits can and must be pushed.
4. Although Def Leppard started its first season (1997) for the purpose of mocking others, we quickly shifted our focus toward entertainment, both of our fans and ourselves, and toward gaining free publicity for our social group.
5. The more spectacle and controversy, both on and off the court, the better.
Applying the guiding principles outlined above, I'd like to point out that only good things can flow from an underling within the intramural organization attempting to ban the team.
Unfortunately, the deeds of my generation have caused certain modifications of the official rules, which present an uphill challenge for the current team. Specifically, I understand that there is a rule against dressing or acting in a way that makes a mockery of the game. Fair game. You will have to work around this rule by being specific in your on-court strategy. There must be a certain earnestness in everything you do.
In dressing up, don't wear drag (like we sometimes did) or a business suit (ditto). Instead, go as extreme as you can with hardcore, old school, ridiculous court attire. You can still wear the other stuff during pre-game warmups, and so can your fans and support staff. The worst they can do (legitimately) is ask you to leave. As long as your players show up at game time in "appropriate" basketball attire, they have to let you play.
Let's assume that you, as a group, grow a pair and decide to do the Def Leppard name proud in your next duly scheduled athletic competition. The absolute worst thing that can happen, so long as no one dies, is that someone at the game tries to ban you. First of all, you shouldn't care about your eligibility to play in something as lame as college intramural sports. Second, being banned would be an amazing opportunity to cause a ruckus off the court. I'm thinking appeals process, fan petitions, letters to the editor, flyers, newspaper stories, local newschannel coverage, picketing protests in the "Wilk" and so on. Def Leppard is about so much more than playing basketball.
You are not there to mock the game or the system. You are there to shine a light on the retardedness of the system. Your team may have to go down as a martyr and give way for the next generation to take up the reins. If that happens, go out with a lot of noise and have fun while doing it. Point out that you are willing to abide by every rule of the system, cheerfully. You just have a non-traditional approach to enjoying the sport of basketball and should be allowed to pursue that.
It should be noted, here, that a majority of our trick plays are not "mocking the game." They are actually every bit as effective as traditional basketball plays (except Football Play - that one never works and is a little bit mocking). A general guideline for the creation and execution of plays: you are an eager, yet dim newcomer to the sport of basketball with some misguided ideas about how to win the game. Keep track of your success rate. Ours was easily over 50%.
Further, who within BYU Intramural Sports has been ordained keeper of the true spirit of basketball? How on earth can they claim that eager individuals thinking out of the box about ways to score are mocking this indefinable concept of "the Game?" This is just one of the things that makes the intramural institution so ridiculous and mock-worthy. That's what you are there to show. Not by open mocking, but by exposing the whole process to the larger BYU community. Let others mock what you uncover. Rallying other students to your cause, publicly overcoming a putative banishment, having fun the whole time you are doing it - that is true Def Leppard-osity. Rent the movie Footloose. Fight the idiocy and smallness pervading the system. Not by open rebellion, but by having a good time.
Wimping out at this point places you squarely within the system you set out to shake up. Don't be so willing to back down.
Also - any half attempts at playing Def Leppard basketball are just so not ok with me. If you're not going to take it over the top and really go for it, please just change your name to Poison and play regular ball. Continued authorized use of the Def Leppard name is spefically conditioned on carrying on in the spirit of your forefathers.
Seriously.
Some weeks ago, I gave you my blessing in resurrecting a noble institution, even going so far as to authorize the use of the Def Leppard name. I have recently learned that fear of intramural banishment has caused certain members of the group to fail in this sacred trust by not upholding the time-honored ideals of Def Leppard Basketball.
Here's a little refresher course:
1. Def Leppard is not, in fact, about the sport of basketball.
2. At no time should the team ever focus on winning the game.
3. Letter-of-the-law sportsmanship and rule-keeping is a must - in fact, this concept taken to its extreme can be an entertaining and rewarding part of the Def Leppard experience. The limits can and must be pushed.
4. Although Def Leppard started its first season (1997) for the purpose of mocking others, we quickly shifted our focus toward entertainment, both of our fans and ourselves, and toward gaining free publicity for our social group.
5. The more spectacle and controversy, both on and off the court, the better.
Applying the guiding principles outlined above, I'd like to point out that only good things can flow from an underling within the intramural organization attempting to ban the team.
Unfortunately, the deeds of my generation have caused certain modifications of the official rules, which present an uphill challenge for the current team. Specifically, I understand that there is a rule against dressing or acting in a way that makes a mockery of the game. Fair game. You will have to work around this rule by being specific in your on-court strategy. There must be a certain earnestness in everything you do.
In dressing up, don't wear drag (like we sometimes did) or a business suit (ditto). Instead, go as extreme as you can with hardcore, old school, ridiculous court attire. You can still wear the other stuff during pre-game warmups, and so can your fans and support staff. The worst they can do (legitimately) is ask you to leave. As long as your players show up at game time in "appropriate" basketball attire, they have to let you play.
Let's assume that you, as a group, grow a pair and decide to do the Def Leppard name proud in your next duly scheduled athletic competition. The absolute worst thing that can happen, so long as no one dies, is that someone at the game tries to ban you. First of all, you shouldn't care about your eligibility to play in something as lame as college intramural sports. Second, being banned would be an amazing opportunity to cause a ruckus off the court. I'm thinking appeals process, fan petitions, letters to the editor, flyers, newspaper stories, local newschannel coverage, picketing protests in the "Wilk" and so on. Def Leppard is about so much more than playing basketball.
You are not there to mock the game or the system. You are there to shine a light on the retardedness of the system. Your team may have to go down as a martyr and give way for the next generation to take up the reins. If that happens, go out with a lot of noise and have fun while doing it. Point out that you are willing to abide by every rule of the system, cheerfully. You just have a non-traditional approach to enjoying the sport of basketball and should be allowed to pursue that.
It should be noted, here, that a majority of our trick plays are not "mocking the game." They are actually every bit as effective as traditional basketball plays (except Football Play - that one never works and is a little bit mocking). A general guideline for the creation and execution of plays: you are an eager, yet dim newcomer to the sport of basketball with some misguided ideas about how to win the game. Keep track of your success rate. Ours was easily over 50%.
Further, who within BYU Intramural Sports has been ordained keeper of the true spirit of basketball? How on earth can they claim that eager individuals thinking out of the box about ways to score are mocking this indefinable concept of "the Game?" This is just one of the things that makes the intramural institution so ridiculous and mock-worthy. That's what you are there to show. Not by open mocking, but by exposing the whole process to the larger BYU community. Let others mock what you uncover. Rallying other students to your cause, publicly overcoming a putative banishment, having fun the whole time you are doing it - that is true Def Leppard-osity. Rent the movie Footloose. Fight the idiocy and smallness pervading the system. Not by open rebellion, but by having a good time.
Wimping out at this point places you squarely within the system you set out to shake up. Don't be so willing to back down.
Also - any half attempts at playing Def Leppard basketball are just so not ok with me. If you're not going to take it over the top and really go for it, please just change your name to Poison and play regular ball. Continued authorized use of the Def Leppard name is spefically conditioned on carrying on in the spirit of your forefathers.
Seriously.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Italian Dinner Sunday
Dear Elitists,
Hey guys, remember that auction I won? Well, I won an Italian dinner for 6 people at 7:00 on Sunday in the apartment of Alyssa M, Kristen M, Asia S, Sarah S, Laura N, and the new sister. I am taking one spot for myself, the other 5 are on a first come, first served basis. So the first 5 to respond to this blog get to go.
Have a great day guys!
Hey guys, remember that auction I won? Well, I won an Italian dinner for 6 people at 7:00 on Sunday in the apartment of Alyssa M, Kristen M, Asia S, Sarah S, Laura N, and the new sister. I am taking one spot for myself, the other 5 are on a first come, first served basis. So the first 5 to respond to this blog get to go.
Have a great day guys!
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Utah Flash assessment
My perspective of the Utah Flash:
I think that the Utah Flash are losers. They send out losers to try and sell season tickets to a public that doesn't care. Why insult my intelligence trying to get me to shell out over a hundred bucks to see every game when I would be hesitant to go to just one game for free.
Here's my chain of basketball watchability (Note: the same may be true for skill level as well)
1. Olympic basketball tournament
2. NBA
3. NCAA Men's Basketball
4. WNBA
5. NAIA Division 2 Men's basketball
6. County school district Donkey Basketball fundraiser
7. YMCA kids division 8-10 year olds.
8. Whatever league the Utah Flash plays in.
9. Def Leppard fan club actually trying to win.
10. Wheelchair basketball.
So you see, I do grant you that the Flash are better than me and the wheelchair players, but the but the Flash aren't nearly as cute to watch as the amputees on wheels.
It's like going to a high school game except you don't know any of the players, none of them are even your friend's little brother. So why go? You shouldn't.
Stop trying to put the JV team on a pedestal. The NBA has already proven to the world that Americans are content with fancy mediocrity. To validate the Utah Flash in their attempts to be a professional team worth paying to watch is to just promote straight up, un-fancy sub-mediocrity.
It's almost like the XFL. Remember watching them? These were all the players who weren't even good enough to get into college football teams. The Utah Flash can do no better for they are no better.
I think that the Utah Flash are losers. They send out losers to try and sell season tickets to a public that doesn't care. Why insult my intelligence trying to get me to shell out over a hundred bucks to see every game when I would be hesitant to go to just one game for free.
Here's my chain of basketball watchability (Note: the same may be true for skill level as well)
1. Olympic basketball tournament
2. NBA
3. NCAA Men's Basketball
4. WNBA
5. NAIA Division 2 Men's basketball
6. County school district Donkey Basketball fundraiser
7. YMCA kids division 8-10 year olds.
8. Whatever league the Utah Flash plays in.
9. Def Leppard fan club actually trying to win.
10. Wheelchair basketball.
So you see, I do grant you that the Flash are better than me and the wheelchair players, but the but the Flash aren't nearly as cute to watch as the amputees on wheels.
It's like going to a high school game except you don't know any of the players, none of them are even your friend's little brother. So why go? You shouldn't.
Stop trying to put the JV team on a pedestal. The NBA has already proven to the world that Americans are content with fancy mediocrity. To validate the Utah Flash in their attempts to be a professional team worth paying to watch is to just promote straight up, un-fancy sub-mediocrity.
It's almost like the XFL. Remember watching them? These were all the players who weren't even good enough to get into college football teams. The Utah Flash can do no better for they are no better.
The Elite 8 Blog
I remember when the blog used to be fun and entertaining to read; reflecting what the Elite 8 represents.
Forgiveness
I just want to make it known that I forgive whoever the perpetrator was that egged my car. I will not be seeking retribution nor retaliation. I speak for myself and no one else. Anyone may express their opinions in the comments.
Since Cincinnatus' car was not egged nor his apartment, his previous statement which has since been erased and re-written by Drock should not be considered as a reflection of the views of the group directly affected by the action, namely apartment 36. As the Elite8, he is right, we will not retaliate as a group. I do not speak for #36, but for my part, I hope/expect that the perpretators will come forward and make appropriate restitution, be it voluntarily or obligatorily.
I applaud his loyalty and concern. I only state that the "we" as stated in the now disappeared post does not include me.
I applaud his loyalty and concern. I only state that the "we" as stated in the now disappeared post does not include me.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Polar Ducks? Please!
Congratulations to Dane on getting published in the Daily Universe.
Polar ducks really are an issue. Way to create awareness.
Polar ducks really are an issue. Way to create awareness.
Attention all Readers
I think it is time that I make some things known publicly so that all of the misunderstandings and the egging of my car can stop. I have recently been called, relative to the subject we are now considering, selfish, rude, inconsiderate, insensitive, mean, unwilling to cooperate and stupid. I understand that if you look through a single isolated zeitgeist and paradigm you probably would think that. Maybe if I share some of the unknown information, you might be able to broaden your understanding and maybe... just maybe change your minds. All need to understand that the previous post of ProDate vs. ProWait was an isolated conversation between two people; between two secondary and even third person sources. None of them were primary. Hopefully by giving you a primary source you might be able to understand a little more clearly. I am not going to use the completely conspicuous code names, but just go right out and state them. I intend to offend no one with what I'm going to say.
First of all, I would like to address the issue of selfishness. I have been called selfish because supposedly I have told people that they're not allowed to like each other because it will hurt my feelings. As far as I recall, I haven't said anything of that nature. I still do have feelings for Camilla. It has taken a lot longer for them to subside than expected, probably due to the close proximity of living quarters and the infrequent associations that we still have. I know that she doesn't feel the same way and that is also what makes it hard. I can live with it. Other people have taken her on dates and that is completely fine. I didn't say anything about it. The thing that hurt most was that it felt like they were trying to go behind my back. If my friends want to take her out, that is completely fine, I just wish that they would let me know instead of me finding out by chance and feeling like they were trying to hide it from me. So if it is selfish to ask your friends to not go behind your back, then yes I am selfish. As for me asking people not to date Camilla because I still have feelings for her, that, I have not done. So Camilla it is ok for you to date Jeremy or Nat or whoever it is you like from our group. I'll be fine. Don't hold back because of me. Guys, just do what we talked about in our meeting, that's all I ask.
Secondly, I have been called uncooperative, rude, mean, selfish, etc. because I have not been the one who has stepped up and tried to bridge the gap of communication and recover the friendship between Camilla and myself. I forgot when this became my responsibility. In case anyone forgot, I was the one who was dumped. I am the one who still has feelings for her. And as selfish as that might sound, it really does hurt to be around her. If anyone has ever heard one of the songs I wrote, the chorus line is "Seeing you and knowing you're not mine is a dagger that's piercing me inside of my heart." That really is how I feel. So you may call me selfish for not being a glutton for pain. I really try to act normal when she is around and not ignore her and I'm sorry if I'm not doing the best job but at least I'm trying. And I know that everyone is biased against me and says that I should be the man and step up and do it, but it's something I choose not to do because I really don't enjoy the emotional heartache it brings.
So you may continue to think that I'm a horrible person, I really won't mind. But at least now you know the facts.
First of all, I would like to address the issue of selfishness. I have been called selfish because supposedly I have told people that they're not allowed to like each other because it will hurt my feelings. As far as I recall, I haven't said anything of that nature. I still do have feelings for Camilla. It has taken a lot longer for them to subside than expected, probably due to the close proximity of living quarters and the infrequent associations that we still have. I know that she doesn't feel the same way and that is also what makes it hard. I can live with it. Other people have taken her on dates and that is completely fine. I didn't say anything about it. The thing that hurt most was that it felt like they were trying to go behind my back. If my friends want to take her out, that is completely fine, I just wish that they would let me know instead of me finding out by chance and feeling like they were trying to hide it from me. So if it is selfish to ask your friends to not go behind your back, then yes I am selfish. As for me asking people not to date Camilla because I still have feelings for her, that, I have not done. So Camilla it is ok for you to date Jeremy or Nat or whoever it is you like from our group. I'll be fine. Don't hold back because of me. Guys, just do what we talked about in our meeting, that's all I ask.
Secondly, I have been called uncooperative, rude, mean, selfish, etc. because I have not been the one who has stepped up and tried to bridge the gap of communication and recover the friendship between Camilla and myself. I forgot when this became my responsibility. In case anyone forgot, I was the one who was dumped. I am the one who still has feelings for her. And as selfish as that might sound, it really does hurt to be around her. If anyone has ever heard one of the songs I wrote, the chorus line is "Seeing you and knowing you're not mine is a dagger that's piercing me inside of my heart." That really is how I feel. So you may call me selfish for not being a glutton for pain. I really try to act normal when she is around and not ignore her and I'm sorry if I'm not doing the best job but at least I'm trying. And I know that everyone is biased against me and says that I should be the man and step up and do it, but it's something I choose not to do because I really don't enjoy the emotional heartache it brings.
So you may continue to think that I'm a horrible person, I really won't mind. But at least now you know the facts.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
and the response is in!
Engl312 - Persuasive writing.
The prompt:
"This third rhetorical situation will require something a little more intimate. Think of someone close to you—a friend, a roommate, a family member, an acquaintance, a secret crush, a neighbor—and write a persuasive personal letter to him or her (or them) in which you attempt to convince your audience of something. It can be about anything. You might know someone who's about to make a bad decision, or you may have a long-standing argument with a friend. Write a letter (or email) to that person using any of the rhetorical strategies we have read about in the first part of Ancient Rhetorics. You should include research as necessary."
My letter, hand delivered at end of class, 1:40p.m. Mon, 4 Feb '08:
Dear [Valencia, f, member of said writing class, former fellow freshman ward member, and former home evening group "daughter" of author in said ward],
I shouldn't even have to write this letter to you. I imagine it may blindside you. It shouldn’t, but it might. Then again, I think you’re sharp enough to realize I was trying to pretend like I didn’t hear you when you asked who I was writing to—though I am totally sure you know I heard—and because I’m positive you were fully conscious when I asked you on two dates since learning that you are single. Both times you were unavailable. Shakespeare said it best: “The course of true love never did run smooth” (A Midsummer Night's Dream, I,i,5). And now to the chase: after an exhaustive and painstaking investigation of the dating pool, I’ve determined that I’ll never find the perfect girl—and even if I did she wouldn’t dig me—but you strike the balance of nearing perfection and yet being capable of having a lapse in judgment to take a chance on me. So let’s date—regularly. Should you fear a huge and sudden leap, please remember Elder Oaks’ distinction between dating and courting; his dating—planned, paid for, paired off, simple and frequent—is the kind of dating I am talking about ("Dating versus Hanging Out," Ensign, June 2006, 10).
Now before you feel compelled to answer, step back for a moment and let’s agree on something. Consider first this “hypothetical” situation: A gal asks a guy, pretty much out of the blue, if he is dating anybody. He says, “no I’m not. Well, not anyone steadily.” He pauses and then asks, “Are you?” The girl, almost immediately, says, “Nope.” Moments before this conversation takes place, the guy and the gal we are considering have a brief conversation suggesting, with some humor I admit, that they should work together because one’s strength is the other’s weakness and vice versa—in other words, you could say that the guy and the gal complement each other. Moments after exchanging dating statuses, neither of the two mentions that they are pursuing anyone else. So that’s the situation—as I experienced it.
Here’s where agreeing will be important: a legitimate conclusion the guy may draw is that the gal wanted him to know that she was available for dates—in the very least that she’s not opposed to going on dates with him. If a single girl is not pursuing other options and asks a boy about his dating status, especially when she brings it up, the boy has every reason to believe this girl has a measurable interest in him. True? In fact, if you were the roommate of the girl in this situation and found out the boy never asked the girl on a date, I can imagine you throwing your arms up in despair: “how are men so oblivious?!” If I have entirely misread this situation and my conclusion is a blunder, then I will concede error and you may stop reading my words. If, however, we agree, please read on.
Now something this girl could to do be helpful to the boy—assuming she is interested—is to be sure to suggest alternate times if she is unavailable. “I’m sorry that’s not going to work. What about next weekend?” “Oh no! I am already (fill in the blank), could we do something Thursday instead?” Similar, short, simple statements suggest small but significant interest.
So, [Valencia, f], let’s agree to regularly make time for each other over the next several weeks and go on some dates—one won’t do, the first few are always awkward. We may just find that we do complement each other and we have something to learn together; we’ll be better off for trying. Have no worries about long-term commitments or tight exclusivity—we’ll figure out how to cross those bridges should we journey that far. One bridge, however, that I’d like to cross right away is the awkward process of me fishing in the dark as I guess when you have a free night. If you favor my suggestion, let’s sit down with our schedules and find some common open space in our busy lives. The great Cat Stevens sang: “Two fine people should love each other. Two fine people should help each other…”
Respond as you please. Be clever if you wish. And please, don’t leave me hangin’ too long.
[signed]
Her response, *drum roll please,* sent via private Facebook message, 9:02p.m. Tues, 5 Feb '08:
Subject: A much less witty response...but a response nonetheless :)
Hey [Cincinnati, m]!
Thanks so much for your letter...talk about well written!! :) I really appreciate what you wrote. Now I'll take a turn explaining my side...even though it will be much less eloquent...hehe...
The day we talked in the computer lab and I asked you if you were dating anyone...I didn't realize that I came off as eager for a date as you described. lol But I was asking because I thought it would be fun to catch up sometime. Later on that same day, I ran into a guy friend of mine that I've known for quite a while. We had tried dating in the past and timing was always off for us. But we ran into eachother [sic] again that day and started talking and catching up. He asked me out numerous times over the next few weeks and we started hanging out and now we're dating. That is why I was busy when you invited me out. Nothing was official between me and my friend, but things were starting to progress. Sorry for not being more direct with you - just didn't know quite what to say.
I'm also sorry to have given you the signals to ask me out and then not follow through. I didn't know things would pick up with my friend right around the same time.
I hope that makes sense...and sorry again for any confusion. Dating is one of those crazy things that isn't often very predictable it seems. I appreciate your friendship and your willingness to let me know how you feel. And you are one persuasive writer...if I weren't starting to date someone else, I'd have loved to catch up and hang out with you!
Hope you're doing well...see you in class tomorrow [Cincinnati, m] :)
[Valencia, f]
Meeting
Just wanted to remind you that we are meeting tonight before the basketball game at apartment 36 at 7:30.
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