Attention all Readers

I think it is time that I make some things known publicly so that all of the misunderstandings and the egging of my car can stop. I have recently been called, relative to the subject we are now considering, selfish, rude, inconsiderate, insensitive, mean, unwilling to cooperate and stupid. I understand that if you look through a single isolated zeitgeist and paradigm you probably would think that. Maybe if I share some of the unknown information, you might be able to broaden your understanding and maybe... just maybe change your minds. All need to understand that the previous post of ProDate vs. ProWait was an isolated conversation between two people; between two secondary and even third person sources. None of them were primary. Hopefully by giving you a primary source you might be able to understand a little more clearly. I am not going to use the completely conspicuous code names, but just go right out and state them. I intend to offend no one with what I'm going to say.

First of all, I would like to address the issue of selfishness. I have been called selfish because supposedly I have told people that they're not allowed to like each other because it will hurt my feelings. As far as I recall, I haven't said anything of that nature. I still do have feelings for Camilla. It has taken a lot longer for them to subside than expected, probably due to the close proximity of living quarters and the infrequent associations that we still have. I know that she doesn't feel the same way and that is also what makes it hard. I can live with it. Other people have taken her on dates and that is completely fine. I didn't say anything about it. The thing that hurt most was that it felt like they were trying to go behind my back. If my friends want to take her out, that is completely fine, I just wish that they would let me know instead of me finding out by chance and feeling like they were trying to hide it from me. So if it is selfish to ask your friends to not go behind your back, then yes I am selfish. As for me asking people not to date Camilla because I still have feelings for her, that, I have not done. So Camilla it is ok for you to date Jeremy or Nat or whoever it is you like from our group. I'll be fine. Don't hold back because of me. Guys, just do what we talked about in our meeting, that's all I ask.

Secondly, I have been called uncooperative, rude, mean, selfish, etc. because I have not been the one who has stepped up and tried to bridge the gap of communication and recover the friendship between Camilla and myself. I forgot when this became my responsibility. In case anyone forgot, I was the one who was dumped. I am the one who still has feelings for her. And as selfish as that might sound, it really does hurt to be around her. If anyone has ever heard one of the songs I wrote, the chorus line is "Seeing you and knowing you're not mine is a dagger that's piercing me inside of my heart." That really is how I feel. So you may call me selfish for not being a glutton for pain. I really try to act normal when she is around and not ignore her and I'm sorry if I'm not doing the best job but at least I'm trying. And I know that everyone is biased against me and says that I should be the man and step up and do it, but it's something I choose not to do because I really don't enjoy the emotional heartache it brings.

So you may continue to think that I'm a horrible person, I really won't mind. But at least now you know the facts.