Everything I need to know about life I learned in HEPE

I was told today by a girl that you can tell a lot about a man by his shoes. A rather Gumpish sentiment if you ask me.

In any case, apparently my shoes reflect that I don't match, am cheap, and am prematurely aging into an old man, velcro straps are less than two years away for me.

I just wanted to put that out there because I don't have any particularly funny things to say today.

Oh, and word to the wise, don't ever tell a girl that you would consider using her as a rebound in case your current relationship doesn't work out.

Anything that requires an alarm clock is too early.

Ladies is terrorists too, go and brush your shoulders off.

We all need to take a deep look inside and look at our body mass indexes. Or as Zack might say, indeces or or indexi.

Proper.